Have you ever noticed that the bad days are better than those that start off great and then crash. On the bad days you know what to expect. You don't get your hopes up, everything is "normal." We are used to this place, hell we've been hanging out here for years, right? But on those good days that turn on you, well it's like being betrayed by your best friend. Like Karma herself is laughing in your face. Like the universe is playing a cruel joke on you that everyone is in on. It feels as though that darkness has you by the ankle and IT will give you a little bit space but pulls you back once you start feeling good. I was in a great mood this morning. But now....My mood is becoming darker, my thoughts are spinning in my head and I feel so dejected. What's the point? Why should I try so hard all the time when it's just going to come back to this? Therapy is helping but on days like this it feels like a battle that I'll never be able to win. The darkness is too strong some days. It tortures me. Engulf me. Consumes me. I am fighting with all that I have not to cry right now. I need the clock to tick away faster so that I can get out of here before IT wins.